(A lot of man will be sad that day.)
Girl: One day I will marry. A lot of men will be sad that day.
Boy: Wow, how many men do you plan to marry?
Boy: Wow, how many men do you plan to marry?
(Order, order!)
Today was my first day entering a court.
The judge shouted: Order, Order!
I was so excited, So I shouted back: fried rice with chicken, five bottles of beer and a chilled glass of special ice mineral water.
I am now locked up in a dark room.
I am sure they will bring my order soon.
The judge shouted: Order, Order!
I was so excited, So I shouted back: fried rice with chicken, five bottles of beer and a chilled glass of special ice mineral water.
I am now locked up in a dark room.
I am sure they will bring my order soon.
(No idea he was a barber.)
A local barber in my area just got arrested for selling drugs.
Blew my mind.
I've been his customer for years.
I had no idea he was a barber.
Blew my mind.
I've been his customer for years.
I had no idea he was a barber.
(You are using it's plate.)
I visited my Ex girlfriend and she gave me food.
After a few minutes their dog came in and started to jump over and I said: This dog loves visitors?
A child replied: No! No! Uncle, the problem is that you are using its plate.
After a few minutes their dog came in and started to jump over and I said: This dog loves visitors?
A child replied: No! No! Uncle, the problem is that you are using its plate.
(After a week of marriage.)
Friend: When did you get to know your wife?
Me: (Sadly) About a week after the wedding.
Me: (Sadly) About a week after the wedding.
(Blow off candle.)
Patient: Doctor, I get a strong stinging feeling in my eyes every time I eat a birthday cake.
Doctor: Next time, blow out the candles.
Doctor: Next time, blow out the candles.
(Still celebrating.)
Husband takes his wife to a disco. There's a guy on the dance floor dancing like a king, moonwalking, break dancing, head spins, the works.
The wife turns to her husband and sighs: You see that man? 25 years ago he asked me to marry him and I said no.
Husband says: Yep, it looks like he's still celebrating!
The wife turns to her husband and sighs: You see that man? 25 years ago he asked me to marry him and I said no.
Husband says: Yep, it looks like he's still celebrating!
(Stay with your sister.)
A husband asks his wife: If I died, would you marry again?
Wife: Oh darling, of course I wouldn't. I'd go and live with my sister. And if I died, would you remarry?
Husband: No, I think I'd go and live with your sister too.
Wife: Oh darling, of course I wouldn't. I'd go and live with my sister. And if I died, would you remarry?
Husband: No, I think I'd go and live with your sister too.
(Ordered groceries online.)
Man: Darling, I just ordered our groceries online.
Wife: Really? You've just sent me a Whatsapp saying I should do the shopping.
Man: Well, that's what I said.
Wife: Really? You've just sent me a Whatsapp saying I should do the shopping.
Man: Well, that's what I said.
(We were so poor.)
The only thing I got on my birthday was one year older.