(Take every two hour.)
Doctor: I've found a great new drug that can help you with your sleeping problem.
Patient: Great, how often do I have to take it?
Doctor: Every two hours.
Patient: Great, how often do I have to take it?
Doctor: Every two hours.
(Not even a scratch.)
(On a mountain trip a man falls down into a crack.)
His wife calls after him: Are you Ok?
Man: Yeah!
Wife: Are you hurt?
Man: No!
Wife: Not even a scratch? But how?
Man: I'm not done falling yet-et-et-et-et!
His wife calls after him: Are you Ok?
Man: Yeah!
Wife: Are you hurt?
Man: No!
Wife: Not even a scratch? But how?
Man: I'm not done falling yet-et-et-et-et!
(Wife got drinking problem.)
Man: My wife suffers from a drinking problem.
Doctor: Oh is she an alcoholic?
Man: No, I am, but she's the one who suffers after I get drunk.
Doctor: Oh is she an alcoholic?
Man: No, I am, but she's the one who suffers after I get drunk.
(Start to forget things.)
Patient: Oh Doctor, I'm starting to forget things.
Doctor: Since when have you had this condition?
Patient: What condition?
Doctor: Since when have you had this condition?
Patient: What condition?
(I'm searching for food remains.)
Husband: Oh darling, since you've started dieting, you've become a passionate kisser
Wife: What do you mean, passionate? I'm looking for food remains!
Wife: What do you mean, passionate? I'm looking for food remains!
(Beautiful personality.)
Policeman: I'm very sorry, sir, but it looks like your wife got hit by a bus.
Man: I'm aware of that, but Karen has a wonderful personality.
Man: I'm aware of that, but Karen has a wonderful personality.
(Who enjoyed it.)
I heard a report about a bad outbreak of the tummy bug, apparently 9 out of 10 people there suffered from diarrhea.
I can't stop thinking about that tenth person who apparently enjoyed it.
I can't stop thinking about that tenth person who apparently enjoyed it.
(Cheated in horse deal.)
(Old farmer Richard was dying. The family was standing around his bed.)
With a low voice he said to his wife: When I'm dead I want you to marry farmer Jones.
Wife: No, I can't marry anyone after you.
Richard: But I want you to.
Wife: But why?
Richard: Jones once cheated me in a hourse deal.
With a low voice he said to his wife: When I'm dead I want you to marry farmer Jones.
Wife: No, I can't marry anyone after you.
Richard: But I want you to.
Wife: But why?
Richard: Jones once cheated me in a hourse deal.
(Why navy captain always goes down with his ship.)
I managed to lose my rifle when I was in the army. I had to pay $1000 to cover the loss.
I'm starting to understand why a Navy captain always goes down with his ship.
I'm starting to understand why a Navy captain always goes down with his ship.
(Bug in a soup.)
A boy asks his father: Dad, are bugs good to eat?
Dad: That's disgusting. Don't talk about things like that over dinner.
After dinner the father asks: Now, son, what did you want to ask me?
Son: Oh, nothing! There was a bug in your soup, but now it's gone.
Dad: That's disgusting. Don't talk about things like that over dinner.
After dinner the father asks: Now, son, what did you want to ask me?
Son: Oh, nothing! There was a bug in your soup, but now it's gone.