(Oh God! Hurry up!)
Son: Mommy, do you know if God has to go to the toilet too?
Mom: No child. Of course not. What makes you think this way?
Son: Well grandpa knocked on the bathroom door this morning and said, "Oh God! Please hurry up!"
Mom: No child. Of course not. What makes you think this way?
Son: Well grandpa knocked on the bathroom door this morning and said, "Oh God! Please hurry up!"
(Don't taste it.)
Cute little bunny comes in a pharmacy and asks if they have carrot ice cream.
Pharmacist: No. This is a pharmacy. We don't sell ice cream.
Bunny leaves. But it comes back the next day and again asks: Do you have carrot ice cream?
Pharmacist: No, Bunny! This is a pharmacy. We don't sell ice cream!
Bunny leaves, but comes again the next day. And the next day, and so on, until after about two weeks, the pharmacist caves in and personally gets carrot ice cream for the next time the bunny comes.
The bunny does come, and again asks, "Do you have carrot ice cream?"
Pharmacist: Bunny, today we have it!
The bunny says: Well then don't eat it. It tastes horrible!
Pharmacist: No. This is a pharmacy. We don't sell ice cream.
Bunny leaves. But it comes back the next day and again asks: Do you have carrot ice cream?
Pharmacist: No, Bunny! This is a pharmacy. We don't sell ice cream!
Bunny leaves, but comes again the next day. And the next day, and so on, until after about two weeks, the pharmacist caves in and personally gets carrot ice cream for the next time the bunny comes.
The bunny does come, and again asks, "Do you have carrot ice cream?"
Pharmacist: Bunny, today we have it!
The bunny says: Well then don't eat it. It tastes horrible!
(Switch off the lights.)
Teacher: How do you turn a white chocolate into a dark one?
Student: Switch off the lights.
Student: Switch off the lights.
(Give me 20 Dollars.)
Son: Dad, I want 20 dollars.
Father: All I hear is want, want, want. I need to hear some more about giving, too!
Son: OK! Dad, give me 20 dollars.
Son: OK! Dad, give me 20 dollars.
(I bet you.)
I bet you 125851265228542 dollars that you didn't bother to read that number.
You just cruised right over it, didn't you?
You didn't even notice I put a letter in it.
Well I didn't. But you went and looked anyway. My, you are quite predictable.
You just cruised right over it, didn't you?
You didn't even notice I put a letter in it.
Well I didn't. But you went and looked anyway. My, you are quite predictable.
(Tell 5 African animals.)
Teacher tells Maia: Name me five African animals.
Maia: One lion and four deers.
Maia: One lion and four deers.
(How do you feed?)
A: Does your dog bite?
A: Nope.
A: Oh, so how do you feed him?
A: Nope.
A: Oh, so how do you feed him?
(That moment.)
That moment when you've changed your answer in an exam in the very last second and later you realize the original answer was correct.
(How do we get to you?)
A guy calls the fire department and yells excitedly: You have to come, now, there's a fire!
Fire department: OK sir, but please tell us how do we get to you.
The man asks, puzzled: What, you don't have them big red trucks anymore?
Fire department: OK sir, but please tell us how do we get to you.
The man asks, puzzled: What, you don't have them big red trucks anymore?
(Want to hear jokes backwards?)
Me: Do you want to hear a joke backwards?
You: Yes..
Me: Very good, start laughing now, than I'll tell you a joke.
You: Yes..
Me: Very good, start laughing now, than I'll tell you a joke.
