Q: Why did the computer squeak?
A: Because someone stepped on it's mouse.
A: Because someone stepped on it's mouse.
Q: What do you call the sound a dog makes when it's choking on a piece of its owner's jewelery?
A: A diamond in the ruff.
A: A diamond in the ruff.
Q: Did the disappointed smoker get everything he wanted for Christmas?
A: Clothes, but no cigar.
A: Clothes, but no cigar.
Q: Did you hear about the sensitive burglar?
A: He takes things personally.
A: He takes things personally.
Q: What did the computer do at lunchtime?
A: Had a byte.
A: Had a byte.
Q: What do you call an unpredictable, out of control photographer?
A: A loose Canon.
A: A loose Canon.
Q: What did the Time Traveler do when he was still hungry after his last bite?
A: He went back four seconds.
A: He went back four seconds.
Q: What kind of tea is hard to swallow?
A: Reality.
A: Reality.
Q: How does a squid go into battle?
A: Well Armed.
A: Well Armed.
Q: What did the duck say to the bartender?
A: Put it on my bill.
A: Put it on my bill.