(Why should we quarrel?)
Teacher: Why should you quarrel with your friends?
Student: Because it's always unknown with whom we need to sit during an examination.
Student: Because it's always unknown with whom we need to sit during an examination.
(Not listening.)
Teacher: Why are you sleeping in the class?
Prisma: Your voice is so sweet that's why, i am getting sleep.
Teacher: Then, why other students are not sleeping?
Prisma: They aren't listening to you, ma'am.
Prisma: Your voice is so sweet that's why, i am getting sleep.
Teacher: Then, why other students are not sleeping?
Prisma: They aren't listening to you, ma'am.
(Give me later.)
Nurse: Sir, Your wife's phone.
Doctor: What's the matter?
Nurse: She wants to kiss you.
Doctor: I'm busy, you take her kiss and give me later.
Doctor: What's the matter?
Nurse: She wants to kiss you.
Doctor: I'm busy, you take her kiss and give me later.
(I'm already married.)
A boy on date in BMW car.
Boy: I hid something form you.
Girlfriend: What?
Boy: I'm already married and have two child.
Girlfriend: Ohhh, you scared me! I thought the BMW is not yours.
Boy: I hid something form you.
Girlfriend: What?
Boy: I'm already married and have two child.
Girlfriend: Ohhh, you scared me! I thought the BMW is not yours.
(How many left?)
5 frogs are sitting on a log.
4 decide to jump off.
How many are left?
Still 5 left.
Moral: Lot of difference between deciding and doing.
4 decide to jump off.
How many are left?
Still 5 left.
Moral: Lot of difference between deciding and doing.
(Magic of chocolate.)
A Nepali and an American both were friends.
They both went into a chocolate store.
Everybody is busy in the store so American steal 3 chocolates and put those in the pocket.
Both came out from the store then American said: Man, I'm the best thief ever, I stole 3 chocolates and no one saw me. You can't beat that.
Nepali replied: This is nothing, you wanna see something better, lets go back to the shop and I will show you real stealing.
So, they went to the counter and Nepali said to the shop boy: Do you wanna see magic?
Shop boy replied: Yes, of course.
Nepali said: Give me one chocolate bar.
Shop boy gave him one, and he ate it.
Nepali asked for the second, and he ate that as well. Nepali asked for the third, and finished that one too.
The shop boy asked: But where is the magic?
Nepali replied: Check in my friends pocket, and you'll find the chocolates I had eaten.
They both went into a chocolate store.
Everybody is busy in the store so American steal 3 chocolates and put those in the pocket.
Both came out from the store then American said: Man, I'm the best thief ever, I stole 3 chocolates and no one saw me. You can't beat that.
Nepali replied: This is nothing, you wanna see something better, lets go back to the shop and I will show you real stealing.
So, they went to the counter and Nepali said to the shop boy: Do you wanna see magic?
Shop boy replied: Yes, of course.
Nepali said: Give me one chocolate bar.
Shop boy gave him one, and he ate it.
Nepali asked for the second, and he ate that as well. Nepali asked for the third, and finished that one too.
The shop boy asked: But where is the magic?
Nepali replied: Check in my friends pocket, and you'll find the chocolates I had eaten.
(Using as a table fan.)
A man dies.
In the heaven he sees a large wall full of clocks.
He asks Angel: What are these for?
Angel answers: These are lie clocks, every person has lie clock! whenever you lie on earth, clock moves.
The man points towards one clock and asks: Whose clock is this?
Angel says: It's Mother Teresa's clock. It never moved, showing that she never told lie.
The man asks: Where is Nepalese politician's clock?
Angel replies: That's in our office. We use it as table fan.
In the heaven he sees a large wall full of clocks.
He asks Angel: What are these for?
Angel answers: These are lie clocks, every person has lie clock! whenever you lie on earth, clock moves.
The man points towards one clock and asks: Whose clock is this?
Angel says: It's Mother Teresa's clock. It never moved, showing that she never told lie.
The man asks: Where is Nepalese politician's clock?
Angel replies: That's in our office. We use it as table fan.
(Definitely of pressure.)
On science class:
Teacher: Tell me the definition of pressure.
Paul: Don't know all but last part only.
Teacher: No problem, tell what you know.
Paul: And this is called pressure.
Teacher: Tell me the definition of pressure.
Paul: Don't know all but last part only.
Teacher: No problem, tell what you know.
Paul: And this is called pressure.
(Give the whole packet.)
Mother was teaching her 7 year old daughter about cleanliness.
Mother: If you wash your face, I'll give you one chocolate. If you wash your hands, I'll give you another chocolate, if you...
Daughter: Wait mom! I'll take a bath and give me the whole packet of chocolate.
Mother: If you wash your face, I'll give you one chocolate. If you wash your hands, I'll give you another chocolate, if you...
Daughter: Wait mom! I'll take a bath and give me the whole packet of chocolate.
(Didn't water the plants.)
Wife: Didn't you water the plants yesterday?
Husband: No. It was raining yesterday.
Wife: Oh fool! Couldn't you do it by carrying an umbrella?
Husband: No. It was raining yesterday.
Wife: Oh fool! Couldn't you do it by carrying an umbrella?