(Are you sure?)
Girlfriend: Are your sure that you love me only?
Boyfriend: Yes dear, I have checked my whole list.
Boyfriend: Yes dear, I have checked my whole list.
(Ate the chocolate.)
Teacher: OMG! what happened to his face? It's all swollen!
Student: He ate chocolate.
Teacher: Is he allergic?
Student: No, but it was my chocolate.
Student: He ate chocolate.
Teacher: Is he allergic?
Student: No, but it was my chocolate.
(Are you really sure?)
Girlfriend: Are you sure you love me and no one else?
Boyfriend: Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday.
Boyfriend: Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday.
(Do something unique in class.)
Teacher: Hey Johnny! Can you do something unique which others students of this class cannot do?
Johnny: (After thinking for sometime) Yes Sir!
Teacher: What's that?
Johnny: I can understand my handwriting.
Johnny: (After thinking for sometime) Yes Sir!
Teacher: What's that?
Johnny: I can understand my handwriting.
(As long as you want.)
(A man picks up his mother-in-law from the train station.)
As they drive off, he asks her: And how long are you going to stay?
She replies: As long as you want me to!
Man: What? You don't want to stay?
As they drive off, he asks her: And how long are you going to stay?
She replies: As long as you want me to!
Man: What? You don't want to stay?
(Why didn't you tell me?)
(A conversation between a pharmacist and a female customer.)
Woman: I need to buy some arsenic.
Pharmacist: Why do you need arsenic?
Woman: I need arsenic because I want to kill my husband.
Pharmacist: What?
Woman: You heard me! I want to kill my husband.
Pharmacist: Why on earth would you want to do that?
Woman: Because he's having an affair with your wife!
Pharmacist: Well why didn't you tell me you had a prescription?
Woman: I need to buy some arsenic.
Pharmacist: Why do you need arsenic?
Woman: I need arsenic because I want to kill my husband.
Pharmacist: What?
Woman: You heard me! I want to kill my husband.
Pharmacist: Why on earth would you want to do that?
Woman: Because he's having an affair with your wife!
Pharmacist: Well why didn't you tell me you had a prescription?
(Cooks really well.)
Sunday school teacher asks Johnny: Come now, Little Johnny, tell me the truth, do you say your prayers before eating?
Little Johnny smiles proudly: No Miss, there's no need, my mom cooks really well.
Little Johnny smiles proudly: No Miss, there's no need, my mom cooks really well.
(Stepped in dog's poop.)
Son comes home and yells: Moooooooooom!!
Mother shouts from the first floor: If you want something, come up and tell me properly. I'm sick of your shouting.
Son goes up and says: Look, I stepped in dog poop.
Mother shouts from the first floor: If you want something, come up and tell me properly. I'm sick of your shouting.
Son goes up and says: Look, I stepped in dog poop.
(Save my car.)
(In the car repair shop:)
Customer: Can you save my car?
Repair man: I believe we could, by screwing a new car in between the license plates.
Customer: Can you save my car?
Repair man: I believe we could, by screwing a new car in between the license plates.
(Try my soup.)
Guest: Waiter! Waiter!
Waiter: What's the problem, sir.
Guest: Please try my soup.
Waiter: What's the problem? Too salty?
Guest: No. Just try my soup.
Waiter: What then, is it too cold?
Guest: No. Please try my soup.
Waiter: Is it too hot?
Guest: No it isn't. Can you just please try my soup?
Waiter: But there's no spoon.
Guest: Finally!
Waiter: What's the problem, sir.
Guest: Please try my soup.
Waiter: What's the problem? Too salty?
Guest: No. Just try my soup.
Waiter: What then, is it too cold?
Guest: No. Please try my soup.
Waiter: Is it too hot?
Guest: No it isn't. Can you just please try my soup?
Waiter: But there's no spoon.
Guest: Finally!