(Married the wrong man.)
(At a party, one woman says to another.)
Woman: Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?
Another Woman: Yes, because I married the wrong man.
Woman: Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?
Another Woman: Yes, because I married the wrong man.
(Looking for expiry date.)
Wife: Darling, what are you looking for?
Husband: Nothing.
Wife: Why have you been reading our marriage certificate for an hour?
Husband: I was just looking for the expiry date.
Husband: Nothing.
Wife: Why have you been reading our marriage certificate for an hour?
Husband: I was just looking for the expiry date.
(How many coins?)
A guy says to his friend: Guess how many coins I have in my pocket.
The friends says: If I guess right, will you give me one of them?
The first guys says: If you guess right, I'll give you both of them.
The friends says: If I guess right, will you give me one of them?
The first guys says: If you guess right, I'll give you both of them.
(Wait a minute.)
(A man is talking to God.)
Man: God, how long is a million years?
God: To me, it's about a minute.
Man: God, how much is a million dollars?
God: To me it's a penny.
Man: God, can you give me a penny?
God: Wait a minute.
Man: God, how long is a million years?
God: To me, it's about a minute.
Man: God, how much is a million dollars?
God: To me it's a penny.
Man: God, can you give me a penny?
God: Wait a minute.
(Tell me the address.)
Once a lawyer, doctor and a thief prayed to God very heartly and the God got impressed and decided to grant each of them a wish.
So, God went to them and asked them: What do you want?
Lawyer: I want to become richest lawyer in the world.
Doctor: I want to be the richest doctor in the world.
Thief: I don't need anything. Just tell me the address of these two guys.
So, God went to them and asked them: What do you want?
Lawyer: I want to become richest lawyer in the world.
Doctor: I want to be the richest doctor in the world.
Thief: I don't need anything. Just tell me the address of these two guys.
(Go out without permission.)
Son: Dad, when will I be old enough so I don't have to ask mom for her permission to go out?
Dad: Son, even I haven't grown old enough to go out without her permission!
Dad: Son, even I haven't grown old enough to go out without her permission!
(What's your name?)
Interviewer: What's your name, sir?
Man: David without m.
Interviewer: But there's no m in David.
Man: Yeah! That's what I said.
Man: David without m.
Interviewer: But there's no m in David.
Man: Yeah! That's what I said.
(Don't worry.)
Girlfriend: Baby! Why didn't you tell me you are a poor man?
Boyfriend: I was afraid of losing you.
Girlfriend: Don't worry, Dear! I'm sure you can find girl better than me.
Boyfriend: I was afraid of losing you.
Girlfriend: Don't worry, Dear! I'm sure you can find girl better than me.
(Spends too much.)
A: My wife spends too much money. She asks me $500 daily.
B: OMG! What does she do with that much money?
A: Don't know. Because I haven't given her a single coin.
B: OMG! What does she do with that much money?
A: Don't know. Because I haven't given her a single coin.
(I can't marry you.)
(Lastly, boyfriend told his girlfriend.)
Boyfriend: I can't marry you dear. My family don't allow me to do that.
Girlfriend: (in a sad voice) Why? Who are there in your family?
Boyfriend: Wife and two children.
Boyfriend: I can't marry you dear. My family don't allow me to do that.
Girlfriend: (in a sad voice) Why? Who are there in your family?
Boyfriend: Wife and two children.